Opportunity

I've enjoyed a bit of a wake up call this week.  All my life I've associated opportunity with goals.  Making that association has been rather crippling as I look back on things.  Goals have been connected with such adages as "shoot for the stars," so I've spent my time seeking pretty lofty opportunities.  Couple that with the adage, "opportunity only knocks once," and you have a formula for scarcity thinking.  I've always been a relatively positive person and always anticipated the appearance of the next opportunity.  Usually, they have come, sometimes in disguise, but always beneficial.  Trouble is, I've wasted a ton of time looking for the big opportunities and overlooking the little ones.

Let me give you a current example from my life.  I'm looking for a full time employment opportunity.  As I have yet to find one that has materialized for me, I'm rather strapped for cash.  I have often said that my unfinished basement is bogged down because when I have time I have no money and when I have money I have no time.  The other day, while taking a walk, I realized that doing so was a luxury, when compared with my past, when finding time was so difficult.  I realized that right now, I have the opportunity to walk without much time constraint.  That got me to thinking about this subject.  How many little opportunities have I overlooked, looking beyond the mark so to speak?  How many days have I wasted because I was so focused on the distant goal that I couldn't see right in front of me.  How many days of opportunity lie in that basement that don't cost money.  Things that could be done so that when money becomes available, they don't have to be done then.  Days and days worth I suspect.   I thought of another adage.  "Better to aim for the sky and hit the horizon than to aim for the horizon and hit the dirt in the foreground."  I'm not so sure about focusing all my attention on the distant goal, especially if it causes me to look past opportunities in the present.

My friend Dixon often says,  "The past is history, the future a mystery, today is a gift, that's why they call it the present."  I love that.  Since making this discovery I've come to realize that the present is rich with opportunity.  It reminded me of a song I'd not adequately considered.  "There are chances for work all around just now, opportunity right in our way, do not let them pass by saying sometime I'll try but go and do something today."  (Hymns, 223, Have I Done Any Good in the World Today.)  Tomorrow's opportunities may be wonderful and appealing, but there is no better opportunity than lies right before me, right now.  Ever.

There are constantly opportunities to serve others, to learn more, to improve something, to love someone.  These are the opportunities that matter.  We don't have to wait for something big or momentous to take blessed action, we can do it now!  I'm so impressed with the myriad souls who've dropped everything and gone to Haiti to help with the disaster there.  They must be opportunity seizers.  This isn't likely to be their first rodeo in the opportunity game.

One of the great troubles that comes of addiction is the decline into utter selfishness.  I spent so many years in addiction that I've missed out on so many simple pleasures, so many useful concepts and principles.  This is surely one.  Those who know me might point out that I've served long and well in my life and while on the surface that is very true, if I look back and examine my motivations, they are purely self serving ones.  I saw opportunity and service as a means to advance my own ends.  I seldom if ever saw it as a means to bless the lives of others.  Because of that I came think of opportunity as a scarce commodity in the market of life.  Looking beyond the perspective of self, I suddenly have discovered that opportunity is more abundant than anything else.

Every time I have such an epiphany I feel a little foolish for having gone so long with out realizing such a thing.  But that is mostly swallowed up in rejoicing that even this late in life, even after having become so lost and misguided, this earthly probation can be long enough for one such as I to get straightened out and come into the light.  What an ungrateful thing it is to overlook the profound blessing of opportunity.  It is much like the Atonement itself.  It is always available, but what good is the gift if I am unwilling to receive or even recognize it?

Pen Pal Wanted

I've just watched a wonderful old movie starring Anne Bancroft called 84 Charing Cross Road also starring Anthony Hopkins.  It is a wonderful, true story, based on an epistolary memoir of the same name by Helene Hanff.  I've been fascinated lately with epistolary books and have enjoyed several including The Bachelor Brother's Bed and Breakfast books, The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society and Third Wish.  I've come to love that method of story telling as well as the simple, yet fine art of letter writing.

Letter writing is a dying art.  A loss which I am learning to lament.  I shall never forget reading some of Abigail Adams' letters in John Adams by David McCullough, and thinking what a joy it must have been to receive such a letter.  There was so much of warmth, good humor, cleverness and wisdom captured in those marvelous epistles.  How I'd love to write such letters and have a correspondent who would both appreciate and reciprocate with such ease and delight.

The upthrust of all this is that I've decided I just have to do it.  The biggest problem will be to find a like minded soul out in the world somewhere, who might like to embark upon such an adventure.  I went on line and Googled Pen Pal and found those sites to be mostly engaged in matching lonely persons to someone of the opposite sex.  I am not at all interested in getting into a romantic foray with some lonely woman, or man for that matter.  I am very happily married thank you very much.

So, I am taking applications if you will.  I'm hoping for a long term, mentally and emotionally taxing relationship with a total stranger.  People who cannot make such a commitment need not apply.  Applicants must write a letter of sufficient interest and quality as to spark my imagination and persuade me that I've found someone with whom I'll happily correspond.  You need not be like me anyway.  If you disagree with me that is fine, so long as our disagreements are not allowed to foul our friendship.  This of course requires an open minded individual who doesn't mind banter and isn't easily offended.

Email will be an acceptable medium, so long as the bulk of our correspondence is done, thoughtfully, deliberately and dependably.  Typical email and chat abbreviations and streamlining methods will not be tolerated.

I suppose I'd prefer someone from far away, in different circumstances to my own.  Someone who's life and culture do not mirror my own.  I'm afraid I must restrict applicants to English as I have not bothered to become proficient in any other language.  Scold me if you will.  Even so, I'll entertain a pen pal from just around the corner if their personality and presentation so inspire me.

I expect that the person I'm looking for has ideas of his or her own regarding what form such a friendship should take and I am open to negotiations.  Certainly, once the relationship is established further negotiations will be called for as the friendship or perhaps mere association develops.

If you dear reader, are not so inclined, but know of someone who might be please forward this along to them.

Divisive Politics

This is Senator Harry Reid.  I just thought I'd point that out because most pictures I've seen of him lately depict him monstrously, flipping the bird, scowling, in one he even had horns.  I don't think the horns were because he's a Mormon either.  And clearly the depiction of his extended middle finger was not intended as an expression of the disgusting sign I loathe.  I was concerned that you might not recognize him with a smile and kindly look.  There isn't one of us, if we were photographed 1000's of times, that wouldn't produce some fodder for our opponents to mis-depict us.

I'm writing about this because Harry Reid probably has a higher percentage of opponents among his fellow Latter-day Saints that he has among any other group.  I've spoken to Mormon's who've even considered the merits of having him assassinated if you can imagine.  I didn't take their vitriol literally and I seriously doubt if any of them would actually act upon their wishes, but the fact that they even mentioned it troubles me big time.

I have a brother-in-law who lives just outside of Washington DC.  He has been in the Stake Presidency of his Stake and has served as a Bishop.  He has lived near the Capitol for many years.  He pointed out an interesting tidbit of fact - Harry Reid has a reputation for being one of the best Home Teachers in the Church.  Does that startle you?  It got me to thinking.  We have lots of folk in my ward who are not the least bit timid about expressing political views in Gospel Doctrine class or from the pulpit.  If Harry Reid lived in our ward he would undoubtedly be persecuted unmercifully, by such people.  Even when I agree with their politics I am very uncomfortable with them using church as their forum.  I am also very uncomfortable with the oppositionally defiant attitude of so many church members.  I'm constantly hearing them berate people of a liberal bent for listening to the liberal media.  If they'd just listen to themselves they'd hear canned conservative mantras that are equally spawned by conservative media.  The polarizing effect of this is damaging to both the country, the church and the individuals caught up in this contention.

Alma 2:5 - And it came to pass that the people assembled themselves together throughout all the land, every man according to his mind, whether it were for or against Amlici, in separate bodies, having much dispute and wonderful contentions one with another.

If you cross reference the word contention in that verse you'll discover what we all know in the Kingdom, that contention is of the Devil and is to be avoided.  That the adjective wonderful was used to describe it in this context implies astonishment rather than pleasurable excitement.  The observer here, to my thinking is clearly dismayed.  He probably had friends on both sides of that issue, just like we might here.  He probably heard them not only disagreeing with one another, but calling each other names.  He probably heard them casting aspersions on one another's character and making unkind reference as the their parentage and well...you know the drill.  Pretty soon rather than fellows of different persuasions, they've become enemies who are willing to kill one another.

Now I'm not suggesting compromise is the answer, sometimes we just have to take a stand and stand our ground.  But we are also commanded to love our enemies and to do good to those who despitefully use or abuse us.  Further we are commanded to pray for them, not against them.  Conservatives, when was the last time you prayed for Harry Reid?  He is after all your brother in the Kingdom.  Or have you spitefully suggested he have his Temple Recommend revoked because he doesn't see things the way you do.

I might remind you that on July 20, 2009, Harry Reid introduced President Thomas S. Monson and Elder Dallin H. Oaks to President Barak Obama in the White House.  Those brethren presented a fine gift to the leader of our nation.  There was no vitriolic rhetoric, no oppositional rancor.  Do you think President Monson, or Elder Oaks agree with President Obama's views on everything?  Of course not.  Did that prevent them from having influence with him?  Absolutely not!  We are lead by example, but generally speaking, we are not following that example very well.

I believe we have got to learn to express our views in the positive manner in which the Church has shown us.  If we cannot, despite the efforts of our leaders, we will be marginalized more and more and our influence will be felt less and less.  When the church interacts with other religions, it is not in a spirit of compromise or opposition and look what that has accomplished.  So much collaborative humanitarian work has resulted in blessings across the globe.  The other day in the Deseret News I found an article in which Jewish Rabbi, David Rosen suggested that The Quorum of the 12 Apostles should be key players in Middle Eastern Peace talks!  Why would he even consider such a thing if they were as contentious as the general population of the church appears to be.

For many Harry Reid just might be the litmus test for whether or not you've chosen to follow the Prophet. Scroll back up and take another look.  What will you do when you see that face across the prayer circle in the Temple?  I've decided.  I will remain.

Pornography Addiction Prevalent

I'm currently reading a book called He Restoreth My Soul by Donald L. Hilton Jr. MD.  I first heard him speak at and LDS Addiction Recovery Program Conference last summer.  He is brilliant, motivated and insighful in his approach to the subject of addiction recovery.  He is a faithful Latter-day Saint and a renown Neuro Surgeon.

Here are a couple of startling quotes from the book:  (He is speaking of addiction to pornography)

The current scenario of sending the young man on a mission after three to six months of 'white-knuckle' sobriety is only setting him up to intermittent struggling throughout his mission, and/or quick relapse upon return and re-introduction into the overwhelming media barrage he will surely face.

Understand that the majority of young men returning from missions are slipping quickly into addiction, and we must be ready to support them with 12 Step support groups specific to pornography addiction immediately upon return from their mission.

I quote these things not to alarm you but to give you a reality check.  The pernicious plague of pornography is present in the lives of our young men.  It is addictive and problematic, but it won't destroy us. 

Another quote:

While we have emphasized prevention in the past, and should continue to do so, we must also recognize that virtually all of our young men and many of our young women are already seriously exposed, and are therefore already in need of treatment.  By continuing to emphasize avoidance only, we shame the majority who are already caught in the addiction into secrecy and guilt.  We must extend a hand of healing and support to those trapped in secrecy, so there is a safe place for them to seek help.

It could destroy us, but it won't.  I say that having experienced recovery myself, after 45 years of addiction.  The answer is the same as it has always been.  Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, Repentance, Baptism by immersion for the remission of sins and the laying on of hands for the Gift of the Holy Ghost.  The gospel is, has been and ever will be the answer, the only answer.

Satan, has made horrible inroads into our society, indeed our very lives and homes.  His influence is part of the Plan of Salvation.  These kids and adults are not evil monsters, they've just been exposed to a deadly and potentially fatal disease.  It has become pandemic in society and most of society doesn't even recongnize the destruction and havoc it is causing.  Satan's influence through pornography can be overcome, by turning to the Lord.

I always wondered why the Lord told us the story of Zeniff, Noah and Limhi and their people.  That is until I discovered that their story shares a key to escaping this great bondage that is enveloping us.  Most of us, like Zeniff are zealous, even righteous, but we are also willful.  We want what we think we deserve, so we go out and take it.  That marked lack of humility always leads to bondage in one form or another,  In their case it was bondage to the Lamanites.  Gradually, pride leads us deeper and deeper into a trap of our own making.  Evenually, Zeniff's people, under the corrupt tutelage of Noah are utterly bound by their poor choices.  They didn't like their bondage any more than we do.  Ask any addict if they like being where they are.  Of course not.  And each has tried and failed, tried and failed, tried and failed until they are in the depths of despair.

Remember the people of Zeniff and their descendants did the same thing.  They tried and failed repeated times to deliver themselves from the bondage they'd gotten themselves into.  They suffered horrifying losses and returned from each battle weaker either spiritually or physically or both.  Finally humbled, Limhi instructs them regarding the means by which they can escape:

Mosiah 7:33 - But if ye will turn to the Lord with full purpose of heart, and put your trust in him, and serve him with all diligence of mind, if ye do this, he will, according to his own will and pleasure, deliver you out of bondage.

And so, they did, and so did He.  That is the business God is in, delivering us.  Multitudes of Latter-day Saints are laboring in the bonds of addiction.  Most are laboring under the impression that they must deliver themselves and consequently are failing.  That, coupled with widespread secrecy in the matter, are doing great damage to lives and families.  It does not need to end like this.  Ultimately every Latter-day Saint, every person on earth, for that matter, must allow the Atonement of Jesus Christ to take effect their lives.  This principle applies, addict or not.  If addiction drives us to our knees and humbles us sufficiently to reach for that relationship with the Master, the end result will be Perfection in Christ.  Then opposition will have served it's purpose.

Ether 12:27 - And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.

Would prevention have been better?  Of course.  The reality though, is that for many many it is already too late for that.  The call to teach the gospel of faith and repentance is imperative.  Our brothers and sisters have a great need to know that they can indeed be forgiven, and in this case, more specifically, that they can be delivered from bondage.  Addicts cannot (I am unequivocal about this) deliver themselves and thank God it is true.  If it weren't, what need would we have for a Deliverer?
I am certain, that the Lord does not intend to allow this horrific plague to destroy His Church and Kingdom.  He will prevail and He will afflict His addicts until they let Him prevail in their individual lives.

If you or one you love is caught in this trap.  Go to your Bishop, seek the Deliverer, come out of bondage and rejoice in that liberty wherewith you are made free!  You are more than welcome to drop me a note.  I will strictly keep confidences and I'm sure I can help you find help.