Book Review - Lighten Up! by Chieko Okazaki

I read this book years ago and loved it so much that I framed the cover and hanged it on my study wall.  I remains there today.  This morning I finished my first re-read of this wonderful book and was amazed at how much better prepared I was to receive it's powerful message this time around.

Sister Okazaki was a counselor in the General Relief Society Presidency back in the eighties.  She wrote the book directly to the women who are members of that great organization.  Consequently, far fewer men than women have been exposed to this wonderful woman and her marvelous book.  This is a crying shame.

I recommend it to men all the time and after re-acquainting myself with its message, will be pressing even harder to spread the word.

Here are a few quotes from the book to whet your appetite:

Ideals are stars to steer by.  They are not a stick to beat ourselves with.  (Barbara Smith)

In principles, great clarity.  In practices, great charity.

Don't think the Lord can do without any of your gifts, no matter how you feel about them. 

When He tells us to love our enemies, He gives, along with the command, the love itself.  (Corrie Ten Boom)

Whenever I saw a parent trying too hard to make one child fit the family mold, I flinched a little.  I knew there would be trouble.

Maybe you've received a lot of "shoulds" and "oughts" about your spiritual life.  Do any of these sound familiar?
     You should read the scriptures at the same time every day.
     You should go to the temple once a month.
     You should always wait quietly for the answer after you've prayed.
     You should always accept every calling in the Church.
Well, I have another "should" for you.  Here it is.  Are you ready?
     You should do what works for you.  

These are just a small sampling of the wisdom, insight and encouragement Sister Okazaki offers to the willing reader.  I am profoundly grateful for her counsel.  If you feel burdened by your service in the Kingdom, or your home, or your job, or your life in general read this book!  Or be reminded of Sister Okazaki's counsel:

Christ's burden is light.  When he says, "Learn of me," he wants us to do something that will be light and joyful to us, not heavy and discouraging. 

Just this week I heard someone say in Church that we should set a particular day and time to attend the temple and stick to it.  And that if we don't the devil will keep us from getting there.  I think Cheiko Okazaki might have turned in her grave had she heard that.  First of all, the message was designed to make us feel guilty that we hadn't set that date and actually made it.  Second, it implies that there is nothing on God's green earth that is more important, ever, than keeping that date.  Third, it assumes that Satan is the only one who has influence over us on a day to day basis.  Like there's no way that the Holy Ghost would spontaneously prompt me to go to the Temple.

I have heard that counsel before, and followed it.  And sometimes, not very often, I should have been doing something else that I know in my heart was, at that moment, more important.  It wasn't necessarily something big, more often, it was small, like giving my weary wife a break from three toddlers, but it was, at that moment, what the Lord would rather I do.

In church I would much prefer being joyfully inspired and uplifted, than being shamed and guilt tripped into conforming to someone else's view of perfect performance.  Their prescription for my spirituality is no more a match for mine, than are the prescriptions for our glasses.  Thank you Sister Okazaki for releasing me from the guilt our culture so readily seeks to apply.  Thank you Master, for applying the Balm of Gilead to my wounds and the Atonement to my weakness and for offering to be my yoke-mate.

*****

Book Review - Embracing Coincidence by Carol Lynn Pearson

I have been pretty obsessed with observing the synchronicity in my life lately.  I learned about it from Richard Eyre in his book The Three Deceivers and then got quite excited about it after reading Glenn Beck's description of "bread crumbs" in his book 7 Wonders that Will Change Your Life.  Embracing Coincidence is a collection of personal examples of synchronicity in Carol Lynn Pearson's life.

Over the years I have enjoyed her plays, songs and especially her poetry.  Mostly that all came in our younger years and while I kept some of my favorite stuff by her, I lost track of her.  Her book Will I Ever Forget this Day has greatly influenced my journaling and I wonder if I'd still be keeping a journal were it not for Sister Pearson. 

Now she has guided me to an even loftier platform.  Where Eyre and Beck got me intrigued with the concept of synchronicity, Carol Lynn taught me how to notice it, invite it, enjoy it, learn from it and use it!

Her examples are not monumental, but they are extraordinary; and they make this wonderful means of receiving guidance from God seem so very accessible.  The consequence is that I've come to realize I experience synchronicity all the time.  I've just got to learn to notice and ponder it as it appears.

Carol Lynn also makes it obvious that appreciating and making use of synchronicity increases the likelihood and frequency of it's occurrence.  I'm quite sure that when she set out to write the book, she expected to catalogue past instances of synchronicity in her life.  As it turned out, much of the synchronicity she shares occurred while she was writing the book.

This is a fun nightstand read.  Each example is short and sweet and deserves to be pleasantly slept upon.  

Then there's Carol Lynn herself.  Her candid sharing lets us into the heart of a very unique and marvelous person.  The stores of her life and interaction with the world are completely delightful and inspirational in and of themselves.  She breaks a lot of Molly Mormon Molds as she goes about doing good; and it's fun to see first hand, what righteous living bereft of Pharisaism looks like.  Good on ya Carol Lynn!

*****

Book Review - The History of Love by Nicole Krauss

Sweetie has been begging me to read this book for years.  Why did I wait?  I loved it!

This is wonderful story about a lonely old Jewish Man who lives in New York City.  He is retired and alone and goes about trying to get noticed.  He drops his change, or tips over a store display.  One day he even poses nude for an art class.  Anything to feel less invisible.  His name is Leo Gursky and he has good reason to feel overlooked, passed by - invisible.

It is also about a pugnacious young girl named Alma, whose sole ambition seems to be wilderness survival; and her younger brother Bird, who strongly suspects he might be the messiah or at the very least a Lamed Vovnik.  

It is written from the perspective of Alma and Leo; both of whom I adore.  They are so real and accessible.  Krauss has a wonderful knack for making ordinary people and ordinary circumstances become extraordinary.  And then you discover there is nothing ordinary about their connection and the synchronous way in which their lives come together.   

Leo and Alma fancy themselves writers and they sure made a reader out of me!  It's almost hard to give Nichole Krauss credit for her characters have completely upstaged her.

Some reviewers think the book is convoluted.  I think it is an artistic masterpiece which I will read again!

*****

Book Review - My Grandfather's Blessings by Rachel Naomi Remen

This is my third reading of this most wonderful book!  It won't be my last!

Rachel Naomi Remen speaks to my soul.  Rachel is a very interesting person and though the book is not really a memoir, you certainly come away feeling you know her.  And love her.  She's the granddaughter of a Jewish Rabbi who was driven out of Russia.  She is the daughter of parents she calls Socialistic Atheists.  While she doesn't intimate any personal religious preference, she is deeply spiritual.  Her spirituality is open mindedly drawn from Judaism, Christianity, Islam, Buddhism, Mormonism, Hinduism and life!

She has taught me that every moment is an opportunity to learn, to grow and to bless life; our own and that of others.  She is obviously masterful at doing this and by example freely shares her talent.  I am a better person for having read her book, every single time I read it.

Rachel, unlike so many "gurus" these days, isn't about platitudes and quick fixes.  Her stories are read, gritty (often dealing with death or impending death), yet they are loftily inspiring and accessible.  She was diagnosed with Crohn's disease at the age of sixteen.  Surgery after surgery eventually resulted in the removal of her colon.  Despite that she became a pediatrician.  Later, realizing that she wanted to treat the whole person instead of just the ailing body of her patients, she leapt blindly into a new discipline of a much more whole person medicine.  Not with a mind to challenge conventional medicine, but rather to change it.  She has been influential in doing so.

Life has it's grief and difficulty.  If you are dealing with such things, this book will be a profound blessing to you.  It most certainly has been for me.  It was recommended to me by my own Physician and has been the most important thing he ever did for my emotional, spiritual and physical health.  Legion are the ways I have shared Rachel's light with those around me. Though she wouldn't know me from Adam, I am pleased to call her my friend.

***** 

Blessing Life

I spend a lot of time at the kitchen table these days.  It sits by the patio door which offers a wonderful view of the back yard and the critters out there.  We have a couple of rabbits that we release to the yard as soon as the garden is in.  They like spending the winter out of the hutch and we like watching them romp around in the snow.  They dig themselves a burrow during the fall and trim back the lawn and perennials for us.

When the snow falls we go back to feeding them, so they come to the patio for some hay and rabbit pellets.  I also love to feed the wild bird once the snow falls.  I suppose they find it harder to find food when everything's covered with snow.

This year I bought a one gallon black rubber bowl to set out.  The animals can manage by eating snow, but I suppose it consumes a lot of energy.  I set out the bowl yesterday and with the sun on it the water never froze until sunset.  Apparently the black rubber absorbs the sun's heat and keeps the water from freezing.  This was a surprise as the temperature was below zero all morning and after four hours it still hadn't frozen.

The rabbits and birds love having water to drink!

In just 24 hours we've seen Starlings, Eurasian Collared Doves, Juncos and House Finches.  I'm also tossing some cracked corn out in hopes of attracting quail.

There was a time when I wanted to possess these creatures, an others.  At one time or another I've had Chinchillas, an Iguana, dogs, cats, turtles and tortoises, lizards, horses, parakeets, fish, and hedgehogs.  Somehow, the act of caging, penning, leashing, corralling and otherwise controlling their lives became unpleasant for me.  I keep the rabbits only because I don't want to eat them and don't know what else to do with them.  It is painful to put them back in the hutch in the Spring.  I don't think they'll be replaced when they're gone.

Yesterday while watching the menagerie outside the patio door Sarah, the neighbor's cat showed up.  My first reaction was to case her off with extreme prejudice.  I don't want her eating my birds, now do I?  Then I noticed Bandit take notice as well.  Bandit is my grand kid's dog.  He and they live right behind us.  For days I have watched Bandit guard his dog dish.  The doves and starlings have been busy helping themselves to his food and he has been busy chasing them off.  He is mostly Great Pyrenees with a little Australian Shepherd mixed in.  Might even be 50/50 but mostly he got the great genes.  He spends his days supervising the rabbits from his side of the chain-link fence.  Now he's a bit frustrated that he can't chase the birds away from the feeders.  He was really frustrated that Sarah could prance around over here with such impunity.

Anyway, decided if I was about blessing life, I shouldn't be prejudiced toward Sarah.  She needs to eat too. I've always known that when you feed birds you are setting the table for cats and hawks and falcons.  It's just the way of things.  I decided I want to be about blessing life, not fixing it.  So Sarah is just as welcome as the birds are.  She's also a bit frustrated because Bandit's bark is certainly fair warning for the birds and her prospects are pretty slim as Bandit is vigilant in spades.  So, it all works out.  The rabbits have company.  The birds have food.  Sarah has a challenge.  And Bandit, who is a working dog, has a job.

The interesting thing is how I feel.  Emancipating myself from the task of fixing things has freed me up to a lot more pleasure observing how things turn out in my little back yard.  Now, I still wonder about an intruder far more distasteful and sinister than Sarah.  I have a great distaste for Starlings.  We'll have to see if I can make room in my heart to be willing to bless them too.  Oh look!  There's one now!  Getting a drink.  Bandit has him pretty jumpy....so far so good.

I fell asleep last night thinking about this business of blessing life instead of fixing it.  I think it may very well apply to my relationships with people as well as critters.  I think I just might be learning to quit trying to control things.  Life naturally has balance and things usually settle out as God intended.  I've just got to let go and let that happen.  Something tells me things will just work out better if I will stop trying to fix life and simply observe it, love it and bless it where I can.