Friday, July 31, 2009

Rabbit Condominium

How do I get myself into these things?

It all started with an innocent trip to Wally World with my granddaughter. Some folks were standing outside with a box full of bunnies. Well, some were full grown rabbits and one of those looked pregnant. One didn't look too healthy, but hey, the people didn't look too healthy either. The critters were a motley looking bunch. Several colors and variations thereof. My granddaughter was desperate to have one. And after all they were just five dollars each, regardless of the size!

Now little anything is cuter than big anything (with the possible exception of Hillary Clinton) so we opted for two small black ones, hopefully both females. Two, because my granddaughter has a brother. Too, because it appeared that if these folks didn't come up with some cash quick, the bunnies would be dinner by night fall.

I already had a nice wire rabbit cage. Ten bucks and a little rabbit chow and we were in business. Not a bad deal for all the fun the kids have been having.

That is until someone developed visions of more rabbit real estate. Now my plan was to keep the rabbits until fall, whereupon I'd deliver them to my brother-in-law who raises rabbits. A couple of does from a different gene pool might enhance his hutch. Then, come spring, I thought we could pick up a new couple of bunnies to raise next summer. This plan lasted until someone (probably Satan) suggested to the children that said brother-in-law might actually eat their bunnies.

They hired a high priced lobbyist (their Dad) to urge a more winter proof hutch that might facilitate keeping the bunnies all year round and spare them the doom predicted. What the hey, there seemed to be plenty of scrap lumber in my shop, they proposed. As it turns out I'm not all that different than Congress. I haven't finished paying for the last program I started, heck, I haven't even finished the program. Now, I launch on another program to keep the masses at bay, hardly considering the cost. What a politician won't do to garner a few votes from the constituency. What they proposed should be a one day project - two if we painted it. Plus the kids, 7 and 5 would roll up their sleeves and help. Now, two days and five trips to the store later, it's about half finished. And now, I've got to be gone for a couple of days on a foreign affairs junket.

To guarantee my return the kids have had a lawyer (their grandmother) put a workman's lien on the property. So, assuming I return, and assuming I don't run out of money like the Cash for Clunkers Program, we should have pretty good accommodations. The project has two stories, two spacious, insulated nesting boxes, it's handicapped accessible with magnetic door flaps, a ramp from one level to the other, etc. It should really do the trick, but I noticed last night, that there was already talk of an elevator, slide, fireman's pole and big screen TV. There is also talk of more rabbits......

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